Happy New Year all. I don’t want to be negative or depressing on the first day of the New Year, but I am feeling a certain way. I have very high hopes for the year to come and I am looking forward to what is to come. I am however, dealing with feelings of loneliness today. I worked today and came home and found myself bored, not knowing what to do with myself. I decided to do my body a solid, and take a rest day from lifting (I did cardio this morning).
All I wanted to do was eat everything I couldn’t have (being on prep). I was so tempted to take my cheat meal, mainly because I didn’t like the way I was feeling. All I could think about was getting out of these feelings in some way. Lifting usually does wonders for getting me out of that negative headspace, but it was my day off so I was left with myself.
It really makes you think when you can’t turn to negative behaviors to make yourself feel better. It is human nature, and having an addictive personality makes it worse. I decided to post about it in hopes that anyone might be able to relate. If not, it seems to be helping me regardless.
I don’t even really know the point of this post, I guess it is just to bring awareness of the severity of our nature to want to escape negative feelings. Depression is no joke, but we are the only ones who can help ourselves. I know that I can’t expect anyone else to make me feel better. This is just something that I have to work through on my own.